Saturday, July 17, 2010

July 17

I am not committed.
I need to commit.
No food.
No calories.
No anything.
Why do I always mess up on day three?
I need to be stronger.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

July 4

Total failure.
Tomorrow: NO INTAKE
It will happen because it has before.
Fast
Fast
Fast
No Calories
No Fat
No
No
No

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

June 29

I don't know what's happening.
Nothing is going right.
But at least I'm getting better at eating nothing.
I didn't eat until 4 O'clock today.
I need to get a meal plan down before I combust or something.
Anyway, plan for tomorrow?
400 calories.
I'm good at staying under my goal intake.

How are you all doing?
I'd like to hear from you guys.
Stay strong.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

June 24

I like starving.
I got accepted into my first choice.
I start in 2 months.
I. Miss. Starving.
Plan for today?
Well, you know.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

June 22

I think it's really just....halarious how my last post was about being a compulsive eater.
I've been away far too long.
I've been trying to make myself believe that I am normal and that eating as much as I do is okay.
But it's not, and I am not normal.
I am a compulsive eater, and tonight I am starting over.
I ordered a pizza and ate five slices. That is NOT normal.
I am not normal and it took a terrible night like this to make me realize that I am doing nothing but hurting myself.
Tonight I meet up with ana again to talk about my life.
Tonight I have to starve.
I am a compulsive eater and......I need help.

What's scaring me the most right now?
Thinking that I don't have a game plan for tomorrow.
I need a plan.
Starve.

Monday, April 5, 2010

April 5

Do not live to eat, eat only enough to live.

I am a compulsive over-eater and
now is the time to stop.

Tomorrow:
Breakfast: Banana
Lunch: Soy Joy
Dinner: Broccoli
+ 45 minutes treadmill

I will update tomorrow.
PROMISE.

Saturday, April 3, 2010

April 3

Started my 3 day fast today at 1:30 p.m.
I'm so tired of being depressed.
I want to be thin...air...nothing.
I work from 3:30 - 10:00 tonight.
I can't wait to come home and sleep and not eat.
FOOD IS BAD.
I feel so shitty when I eat now.
3 day fast...I can do this because I've done it before.
3 days.
3 days.
3 days.
no calories.
no calories.
no food.
no calories.
3 days.