August 23

I've kind of been restricting full force lately. As of 5 p.m. yesterday evening I haven't had solid food except for coffee. When my restricting comes back full force like this, I know I am in for a ride. I realize this is all probably because of stress and anxiety, but at the same time I want to be able to control my intake to at least 500 calories a day, but sometimes my body just makes my mind block out food. Ack, I mean, whatever it's good because I do need to lose some major pounds, but I really need to look out for myself sometimes because restricting just comes naturally and when it comes back to me it is not good. I remember I went five days without food and lost about 15 pounds and that was the most scared I had ever been. I thought I was for sure going to blow right back up after I started eating again.

ANYWAY, to divert from that topic, I now have all my class books (with some on the way because they had to be ordered) and I have found where all my classes will be so I will not be too frightened about classes starting Wednesday. Am I excited? A little. Am I nervous? Yes. Do I have anxiety? Yes. Do I want to meet new people? Kind of, sort of, a little? My class days wont finish until 5:30 p.m. so I wont be home until well after 6:00 p.m. and I don't know. I just hope that everything works out and that I can get a good study system going so I can feel comfortable and no scared to death that I will fail. Ah well. Only time will tell I guess.

Anyway, how are things going with you girls? Anything new you would like to tell me about? Be it eats or boys or home or friends etc etc., I'm all ears.